Tuesday 7 February 2012

Why you got to be so mean? :|

Oh no no, not you honey :) I had a interesting day in college today, which sort of inspired me to right this post :P Oh and I am sorry I couldn't post yesterday other than Capturing the heart - 9 , as I had a test, records to write and was left with 6 hours including my sleep >.< Second semester has really begun! OK I won't bore you with my routine now, I'll instead tell you how you can handle that super nasty female you have always hated!
PS: I will be using quite a lot of slang here. And I mean every word. Anyone sensitive to them, please censor them yourself, because I would never censor my speech on a bitch! *See? I already started off :P*

So who is a bitch? The formal dictionary defines 'bitch' as a female dog! *How adorable! :** But these days, bitch is rarely used for a female dog, its rather used for a female who is extensively irritating, pissing off and umm bitchy?! :o Oh you know who she is! *Screw the girl running in your mind now 8)* And also, besties are referred as bitches with love :P Though I am still not comfortable calling my besties so, no offence to sweeties who call each other so :) I mean the bitchy bitch here :P
Though its easy peesy to rant and yell and hurl abuses at the disastrous female, it takes quite a lot of maturity to handle the mean-y situation *And I most certainly lack it :P Haha no, I am capable of handling myself :D :)*

So what do you do when the jacked up female is all over your life, messing it? Gossiping about you, speaking ill about you, passing derogatory comments, bullying, de-motivating you? And thatz basically bitching about you? Here are the steps I take 8) *Beeep ya beeeep 8) This is how I beep your case*

1.I.G.N.O.R.E. Blatantly ignore her/the Mean Girls. Most of the time, the attention you give to them is what makes them speak more. Its like adding fuel to fire. Make it obvious that their existence doesn't matter to you. It might be tough for a while, but if you can achieve this, you actually don't need the following tips :P

2.If you can't ignore her, then stop analyzing her acts in your mind. Once the crappy act of hers has entered your mind, all you will do is, analyzing it. "Why did she do this?" "Who all saw her doing that?" "How many people laughed at me?" "I am such a silly creature in college/work space/friend circle now" "What do I do?" Nope. Don't do R&D in your poor head. It has enough work already! What with giving instructions to so many systems, processing your other thoughts- family, love, friend's birthday, bestie's breakup, I-need-that-coral-lipstick, work, deadlines, tests, scores, placements, meetings PHEW!! Don't overload the poor cranium and its contents.

3.Don't replay the act in your mind again and again. No matter how many times you replay, nothing's gonna change. She WILL be that mean bitch. And you WILL waste your time for nothing. Use that precious time for something productive. May be read my blog? Comment? Compliment me? Tell me am awesome? :) *Oh sheeesh, I suck! That was a BAD joke. Sorry :D*

4. Don't react. Verbally or physically (Oh I had a hit a girl in the face and broken her nose when in 1st grade 8) My mom was so proud of me 8)) Just don't give her any stock! How long will she bother you if she doesn't get a feedback? Even Customer Care people STOP calling if you ignore the calls for a few times :P I have done it, and baby it works! 8)

5.Don't be a cry baby. Nah, its not insensitive to call so. Sometimes, we take ourselves too seriously, and might break down at the wrong time. BAD move! It just encourages her more, and somewhere portrays you as weak. I aint saying tears = weak. Sometimes, its just not the right place. Hope you got what I meant :)

6.Make her more jealous! I do it to every bitch in my life. Its very simple and evil 8) What makes her interested in you?

  • You are awesome or
  • You are shy or
  • You are superior to her, but has been the Polite Angel and a Doormat for long or
  • She is effing insecure about herself, and bitches about other people to hide her potholes (The typical bitch)

So by being extra hot, you give her more things to get frustrated about and tear her hair :D Awesome? Definitely! Bitchy? She effing deserves it!

Else if you wanna be more mature and dignified, give those innocent smirks and witty comebacks :D How I love Sarcasm! :D Only you and other smart ones that can get it will know, and the dumb bitch is left astonished! *Punches on the :o face >.<*
Fluency in sarcasm is a must these days!

7. If none of the other tips work, please go to Tip 1 (LOL! The typical Help Center Trouble Shoot :D)

To be honest, if a girl bitches about you, she most definitely bitches about others too! And if you know she does it, others probably know it too :o And trust me, such girls don't go too far. And many many homo sapiens are wise enough not to buy into ultra lame gossips ! "OMG! She kissed her Ex in front of her fiancee and his family!And Oh OMG! He totally held her so tight, I could see his ribs protruding out from her back! OMG! And you know what? Her fiancee joined them in the hug, and her Ex's present GF kissed her fiancee! And the parents celebrated with a dinner! OMG! And she.." STFU Bitch! 

Also, Taylor Swift's song, 'Mean' is an amazing composition :) I stole my title from there :P You-tube it NOW! 8) *continues humming :D*

Image Sources:-
Google-d. I don't claim any ownership! Its funny how only babies and the pup had the expressions I wanted :D

So how did you like the post guys? :) Lemme know!



  1. Hahahha. Nodding all away. Or you could erm write a blog post about her and have complete support on your side like you did :)

  2. Hahaaha!! Way to go girl!! <3 I love this post! Apparently i have had bitches all my life! :P Can't help it! I am too cue. Lmao!! :D I deal with them according to their levels! You know what i mean? If it's someone who has no other work to do, except gossiping away about my life.. Well -- I IGNORE! If it's someone who said something which i just could not ignore, well -- Tit for Tat baby!! :P Hahahaha!! such people are so full of themselves! :) They should actually stop bitching and get a life!:) High five on this post girl!


  3. I meant i am too cute!! :P IGNORE the typing error.

  4. Lol..great write up..n bang on every point :D

  5. Gal, u hv made ol' dis so easy.. i hv these gossiping bitches at my workplace too and seriously, i dont gv a s**t to dem n make dem jealous!! hahhaaaa

    was Nodding wid everythin u wrote

  6. @Beauty Make Up Addict Thank you :D
    Sonshu LOL! Now thatz genius ;) Thanks hon :)
    Pooja_G :D YAY! :D
    @Vanu: You go for it gal! :D Make them more J! 8) And lemme how it worked for ya ;)
    @Butterfly: Honey your comment is seen in my Gmail inbox, but not here :( Anyway thanks for the wonderful comment :D
    Namita <3

  7. Hey but i can see my comment though!! :( Can you see it now? :)

  8. Err it was in 'Spam' honey :\ Stupid blogger! I unmarked it and posted :P Thanks for that hilarious comment now! :D
    Namita <3

  9. lol...this is hilarious...i like this post

  10. Haha thanks :D And I am unable to find your blog :( Its not listed in your profile :( Could u please gimme the link? :)
    Namita <3

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