Friday 26 December 2014

That's the thing about you.

Thats the thing about you. You're like fire. I am the moth. I will always be drawn to you, jerk. I will always have a thing for you. Even when you are 70 and toothless,I'll marvel at your Facebook display picture and wonder at how, can anybody this breathtakingly gorgeous. I will look at your grandkids and hope that at-least them, and my grandkids, will grow up and marry. You'll always be the hero of my baseless fantasies. You'll always be my drug. 

No matter how much you walk away from me, no matter how much I pretend like it doesn't bother me, I will always have a thing for you. You'll be the color to my black and white dreams, I will dream of you in colors that don't even exist. The hazel in your eyes will be the background to all my dreams of you. 

Every time I drape a saree, I will remember the feel of your rough skin against my waist. Yes, you don't remember, it was accidental. You didn't mean to, that day. But I will remember because that day, you took my breath away. Every time I wear jhumki, you'll be as alive as its whispers against my cheek. Every time I strap on my high heels, I will search for your imaginary palm giving me that support. Yes, it didn't mean anything to you, but meant all of the world and two extra planets to me. 

Even when you fly across oceans chasing your dreams, I'll sit in my bedroom and decorate my nights with your thoughts. No, I won't let my dreams die. I am not those stupid novel girls that sacrifice life. But when I chase my dreams across the seven seas, boy, I'l search for your face at the airport. 

There's a sweet torture in getting my hopes high, you know. I know they'll never come true, the wishes on million dandelions that I spent on you. Every time my phone beeps, I hope its you. But insides of me very well know that its just never you. Do you even know how much it lights me up to see your name across the screen? A thousand fireworks explode in my eyes. But you? You'll never have a clue. Every time I pass by my old streets, boy, I will search for you. I know, I shouldn't. But I will. I will run through my chat screen and see your 'online' and hope it turns to 'typing...'.I know, I shouldn't. But I will? 'Cuz you know why? Its sweet torture. 

You'll always be my inspiration to write, even after I marry and have a dozen kids. I will look for your jaw line when I choose my husband, I'll try figuring out if he likes grey as much as you do. I know its not fair, but hey, the heart wants what the heart wants. 

You'll always be my unfinished story, the half written page. You'll always be the song that I'll never learn the last words of. You'll always be the word that never rhymes. That stubborn word that you want to use, but the sentence is never right. You'll always be the favorite tune of my saddest song. You are the incomplete chapter in the story of my life. 

I'll be the awkward verse in your love poetry. Like the verse you write in a haste, and after a while, just doesn't make sense. I'll be that verse. One random manuscript that you'll throw away while drafting your fairy tale. I'll be that girl, the girl you used to know. 


And you know what? We'll never know why. 

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post signature
PS: Hi.
PPS: Nope, I ain't depressed. i just finished reading a very sad, dukhi aatma novel, and scribbled this down. Broken hearts, ugh.
PPPS: Let me know how you like it.
PPPPS: I have an exam tomorrow, I am experiencing last exam vellapanti syndrome. Wish me luck. 

14 comments:

  1. Wow, your post took my breath away! Every line, it was just perfect... :')

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    1. That's very sweet of you, thank you, Sreesha :)

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  2. Did you read my mind girlie ! I Just lost my chances with Mr. Crush yet again ! Which book is it btw- let me sulk a while too..:)

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    1. Awww lol :D Mr.Crush why you do this >( Its this book by Durjoy Dutta, I'll WhatsApp you :P

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  3. No wonder it's a delight to the Broken Hearts!!!!.keep writing :-)

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  4. Nice read indeed..............

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  5. Good one :)
    "You'll always be the word that never rhymes" that's my favorite line in the whole post...a lot of things been right abt someone I know(knew) ;)
    Phone beeps,chat mags, status part..awkward verse of their lives, which might have made any sense to them, but having no idea what it meant to us ;)
    Depressing or not will depend on their own current state of minds , i guess :)

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    1. Thank you, Raina :) I am glad you could connect :)

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  6. You are gifted girl! This article is written to perfection. Definitely touches all of us who have had their hearts broken. And which book is that? I am a sucker for tragic :P

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    1. Aaww thank you :* You are very kind :) And lol, its not a tragic novel, its a bad, bad one :D I'll DM you on Instagram. Worst book ever, I had to write to get the annoyance off me :P

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  7. Namitha :)
    this article is B-E-A-utiful .

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    1. T-H-A-N-K you Praveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen :D

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